Over the last few years, I noticed a healthy trend among the executives: taking time to recharge, be with dear ones and focus on wellbeing (physical, mental, emotional, spiritual).
The concept of the “sabbatical” comes from the Bible. Every 7 years, the farmers were required to give the land a break from agricultural activity (a sabbath). I find this metaphor very profound as our minds also need a rest in order to relax and to abundantly grow afterwards.
This is an excellent time to recharge your body, relax, sleep, read, spend time with family, reconnect with friends, be more in nature, learn a new skill, travel, learn to cook, experience more being than doing.
After working for the last years with many executive coaching clients going through transitions, I would like to share with you 5 of the most common mistakes people make when taking a sabbatical:
1. Ego panic and the need for busyness
When I left my corporate role, I moved from being a Chief People Officer for 24 countries to being just a young mum, a joyful life-partner and very inexperienced entrepreneur. I remember looking at my agenda for a week and panic when I saw no meeting, no to do list, just nothing! Can you imagine? I have never experienced that before.
And that nothingness forced me to face my fears, my strengths, my values and purpose, it forced me to learn how to be, after 37 years of mainly doing.
When they take a sabbatical, a break between jobs or maternity leave, most of my executive coaching clients say the same things: “I already have planned the whole time!”, “My calendar is full for the next weeks”, “I would need much more time to actually have time to relax”.
The main problem is not the time, the main problem is the ego.
With big titles, big cars, big money, the ego becomes naturally big as well. And when we stop, the ego doesn’t like it and it forces us to find sources to feed it, to become busy and prove that we are worthy.
2. Keeping the corporate mindset
When we stop, there is a high tendency to behave the same way. In corporate roles, we usually have the company infrastructure to support us. I found it really hard to manage the admin part alone – getting a new car, laptop, phone subscription, medical insurance etc. There is usually a moment of awareness when we realise that people don’t do things for us anymore, unless we are kind, or we pay for a service.
3. Expecting a major shift to happen exactly when we want and how we want
I don’t know about you, but I was expecting a breakthrough right away. I had a coaching client who took 3 months off to travel, after 2 months of break, she was very disappointed because the big breakthrough didn’t come: “2 months are gone, I just slept a lot and relaxed, but I don’t feel different!”.
Recovering from chronic stress might take a while and having profound aha moments or breakthroughs require our body and mind to be in a balanced, relaxed, creative space. It is not something we can force, it is like sleep: we can create the pre-conditions to fall asleep, we cannot force sleeping.
4. Expecting for the world to stop, just because we have stopped
One of the common mistakes is the lack of awareness – just because we are on a break doesn’t mean everyone is on a break. A source of major frustrations for many of my clients was the way the family behaved: “I took all this time off to be with my partner, and now he is working on this project day and night”, mentioned a former global CMO during our first coaching session. People are in different stages of their lives, the world doesn’t revolve around us, although sometimes in the corporate world we forget it.
5. Making promises, but falling into the old habits in less than a month
90% of the executives I know who took a break, are back to the crazy rhythm in less than a month when back in the office. Why that? Because that’s what we know! We unconsciously learned how to navigate that environment better than how to be a mindful parent, a conscious life-partner, a kind neighbour, a compassionate friend.
Unless we are clear on what healthy habits to keep, create space and find a sparing partner to help us stay accountable, there are high changes to go back to old patterns.
Taking a break is one of the best things you can do for your wellbeing and growth!
Here are 3 questions for reflection to help you make the most of this time:
1. What is your intention?
Be clear about why you want to take this time off work and what do you want to get out of it.
2. Who are you?
Observe your thoughts, your emotions, learn how to accept what comes and make it a source for personal growth.
3. Who is your accountability partner?
You will likely get more of this experience if you have a partner to challenge you, to ask good questions, to keep you accountable and to support you. It can be a friend, your partner or a coach.
If you are on a sabbatical, enjoy it! If you never took a break during your career, I invite you to reflect on the benefits you can get out of it.
Have a joyful summer,
Veronica
Managing Partner
NeuroMindfulness Institute
www.neuromindfulnessinstitute.com
Coming soon in August 2020
NeuroMindfulness® Coach Certification
This in-depth certification course is designed for coaches, trainers, facilitators and leaders who want to understand the key concepts from neuroscience and mindfulness applied to personal development
